Jokes.

Here are some jokes for you people who have nothing to do but read people's blog the whole day...

Your mom is so stupid she tells YOU your mama jokes.            
            
Your mom eats dead babies.            

Your mom is my mom. Am I confusing you?            

Your mom knows what you do right before going to sleep.            

Your mom is like a vacumm, she sucks, she blows and she gets laid in the closet.            

Your mom is so fat and emo she cut herself and bled butter.            

Your Mom is like a bowling ball. She gets picked up, fingered, thrown into the gutter, yet she still comes back for more.
           
Yo momma so fat, she comes from both sides of the family            
            
You're so ugly, your mother had to feed you with a sling shot.            

Your face is so ugly when you cry the tears run up your face.

You have a face only a mother could love - and she hates it!            

You're so fat if you got your shoes shined, you'd have to take his word for it!            

You're so dumb you think manual labor is a Mexican!            

When you get run over by a car it shouldn't be listed under accidents.            

I hear the only place you're ever invited is outside.            

I'll hit you so hard your kids will be born dizzy!            

I hear that when you were a child your mother wanted to hire someone to take care of you but the Mafia wanted too much.
           
You're so fat if you got your shoes shined, you'd have to take his word for it!
           
There is one difference between a rooster and your mom. The rooster says cock-a-doodle doo, your mama says any-cock'll do.            

I hear that when you were a child your mother wanted to hire someone to take care of you but the Mafia wanted too much.            

Wanna get laid? Just crawl up a chicken's ass and wait!            

Your origins are so low, you'd have to limbo under your family tree.            

I feel so miserable without you, it's almost like having you here.            

If ugly were a crime, you'd get a life sentence.            

You look like you've been rode hard and put away wet.            

You're so fat a picture of you would fall off the wall!            

You're like a light switch, even a little kid can turn you on.            

I'll hit you so hard by the time you come down, you'll need a passport and a plane ticket back!            

You're so stupid, that you went to a Whalers game to see Shamu.            
            
You're the best at all you do - and all you do is make people hate you.            
            

Ever since I saw you in your family tree I've wanted to cut it down.            

You're so ugly your face is closed on weekends!            

Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe?
            
You're so stupid, that you went to a Whalers game to see Shamu.            

I think you should live for the moment. But after that I doubt I'll think so.

Instant idiot. Just add alcohol.            

You're so stupid, it takes you an hour to cook minute rice.            

You're so ugly you could be the poster child for abortion/birth control!            
            
You're so fat, that you have to strap a beeper on your belt to warn people you are backing up.            


Lets play house. You be the door, and I’ll slam you.

I hear the only place you're ever invited is outside.            
            
Your mom is so ugly that the Devil slapped her for smiling and then gouged his eyes out with his pitchfork.            

Your mom's so ugly that when she stands on the beach the tide wont come in.            

The term motherfucker refers, specifically, to YOUR mom.            

Your mom is so fat, the astronauts keep believing there is a dimple on the Earth.            

Your mom is so fat, when she goes to the zoo the elephants throw peanuts at her!            

Your mom is... enough said.            

Your mom's breath smells so bad she the reason people grow old and die.

Your mom is so emo she saw a run-over squirrel, brought it home, named it George and bragged about it to her whole friends list.            

Your mom knows what you do right before going to sleep.

Your mom is so emo the Grim Reaper had to put out a restraining order.

Your momma has eleven fingers and fifteen toes, and still can't count to twenty-six.            

Your mom is a creature from outer space.

Your mom is so fat, that when she saw a yellow bus full of white kids go by, she said 'Stop that twinkie!'            

Your mom is so fat, that her period is an exclamation mark!            

Your mom's moustache makes kitty scared...

Your mom is so stupid she thought that a parental control was an abortion.            

Your mom eats dead babies.            

Your mom is...

enough said.            

Your mom was 35 when Jesus was born!            

Your mom is so fat, she entered a fat contest and won first, second, and third.            

Your mom went to prom with Merv the Perv.

Your mom is so stupid she tells YOU your mama jokes.           

Your mom is so fat, that your dad rolled over three times and he was still on top of her.
           
Your mom is so stupid she drove on the driveway and parked on the parkway.            

Your mom shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die.

Your Mom thought you were an exceptionally large crap.            

Your mom is so emo she saw a run-over squirrel, brought it home, named it George and bragged about it to her whole friends list.            

Your mom is so fat, when she goes to the zoo the elephants throw peanuts at her!

Your mom is so ugly, she makes my mom look good.            

You're so ugly if you joined an ugly contest, they'd say 'Sorry, no professionals!'            

Your village just called. They're missing an idiot.            

I believe in respect for the dead; in fact I could only respect you if you WERE dead.            

Lets play house. You be the door, and I’ll slam you.

Are you always an idiot, or just when I'm around?            

You're so ugly, your mother had to tie a steak around your neck to get the dog to play with you.

I hear that when you were a child your mother wanted to hire someone to take care of you but the Mafia wanted too much.

You're so ugly your face is closed on weekends!            

Man alive! But I wish you weren't.

You're so ugly if my dog looked like you, I'd shave its ass and teach it to walk backwards!

You're so fat if you got your shoes shined, you'd have to take his word for it!            

You're so stupid, it takes you an hour to cook minute rice.

Your mom's so ugly that when she stands on the beach the tide wont come in.

Your Mom thought you were an exceptionally large crap.

Your mom is so stupid she calls you a son-of-a-bitch.

Your mom is so fat she swallowed my mom whole.            

Your mom is so fat, that when god created the earth and said let there be light he asked your mom to move!

Your mom is...

Your mom.
            
Your Mom is like a bowling ball. She gets picked up, fingered, thrown into the gutter, yet she still comes back for more.            

Your mom is so fat, the astronauts keep believing there is a dimple on the Earth.

Neil Armstrong wasn't the first man on your mom.

Your mom owes me money, you douche!            

Your Mom is like a bowling ball. She gets picked up, fingered, thrown into the gutter, yet she still comes back for more.            

Your mom is so fat, that her period is an exclamation mark!

Your Mom has a really nice hat...            

Your mom is so fat, that when she saw a yellow bus full of white kids go by, she said 'Stop that twinkie!'            

Your mom is so stupid, she tripped over a cordless phone.            

Your mom is so stupid she took me to the movie theater to see 'Closed For The Season'.            

Your mom is like a brick, flat on both sides and gets laid by Mexicans.            

Using 'Your mom' as a comeback became popular again in the year 2000 thanks to bored Indiana residents who decided that the old 80s joke should be born again for the new generation.

Your mom is outer space.

Your mom is so fat and emo she cut herself and bled butter.            

Your Mom was good last night and I left her money under the pillow.            

Your mom is so fat that people practice by climbing Mt. Everest before they climb her.